Our Crazy COVID Baby and the Art of Letting Go

It is amazing how fast things can happen when it's time for something to end. 

Just a few days ago, the trees here in Michigan's Upper Peninsula stood clothed in all their autumn splendor.

Then suddenly a tremendous windstorm blew through, leaving them stripped to their essence, bare branches against the sky. 

While we from our human perspective may mourn the loss of brilliant leaves, I can't help but wonder if the trees themselves don't feel a bit of relief at dropping them. 

The trees understand: even good things, held onto too tightly, too long, become a burden. 

As human beings, our "autumn leaves" take myriad shapes:

• a house or car that no longer suits us
• a career that has become a dead end
• a relationship that stopped working years ago
• and on and on...
• ...all stemming from underlying energetic patterns and belief systems that may have served us once but now weigh us down and threaten to break us like heavy snow on branches laden with leaves. 

 For me, my "autumn leaves" took the shape of a business that no longer met the needs of me or my husband Rich.

Our Crazy COVID Baby 

A few months ago, a neighbor of ours learned that we were running a successful little e-commerce business raising and selling feeder insects (dubia roaches to be exact) for exotic pets like bearded dragons.

It was something we started with our Covid stimulus checks back in 2020. We were both basically starting from scratch again after leaving previous marriages. Rich had at one time been a major breeder of bearded dragons and knew there was demand for dubias. I'm OK with anything related to animals, so we decided to give it a go.  

The business did well and required only a few hours work per week. So when we told our neighbor we were thinking of selling it, he couldn't for the life of him understand why.

Photo: Rich and me with my daughter and friend in the bug room early in 2021. 

We'd done all the hard work to start a profitable part-time side hustle that was paying off our home. Why let it go now? 

Well, I'm sure YOU can figure out why. It may have been feeding our bank account, but it wasn't feeding our souls! 

• Rich wanted to focus on the home inspection business he'd started at about the same time we started the bug business, and which was growing like wildfire.  In fact, it had been keeping him too busy to help much with the bug business for months. 
• And I was helping Rich with home inspection work while also working towards earning my bachelor's degree in metaphysical science and trying to create art and shoot YouTube videos in a tiny cubby of a room in back of the house (overflowing at times onto the kitchen table). 

I needed a studio. I needed the space. We both needed the time. 

So, I quit. 

I found a business buy-sell site, priced it to sell and topped the listing with the headline: COCKROACHES PAID DOWN OUR MORTGAGE. THEY CAN PAY OFF FOR YOU, TOO! 

In the back of my mind, I thought it would be wonderful if the business went to a family with kids who could learn skills and gain confidence through being involved with a family business. 

But would anyone even be interested in buying a cockroach farm? 

Just in case, we created a Plan B to liquidate by the end of the year if it didn't sell. 

But as it turned out, we didn't have to worry. Not only did many more people than I could ever have imagined express serious interest in the business, but before long we did find the PERFECT buyer:  a mom with a PhD in entomology, experience in sales, and two teenage daughters with marketing skills and a work ethic, who are super excited about running and growing a business that can help them pay their way through college.

Less than 12 weeks after I listed our bug business, we were packing it all up and sending it on a U-Haul truck all the way to Pennsylvania.  With inquiries from prospective buyers still rolling in! 

So what's next? 

Well, even good changes can take a toll. For me, the whirlwind of change that went with selling the business left me feeling like trees in November: a bit depleted! 

What I realized after collapsing the next day was that I hadn't just let go of a business that wasn't serving me any more. It went far deeper. Between this and several other things that 2024 brought up, I was finally getting rid of deeply held negative energetic patterns that had kept me on a hamster wheel of anxiety and fruitless activity for decades. 

Patterns like:

• The habit of taking on responsibilities that didn't serve my highest purpose
• Allowing feelings of anxiety or urgency to dictate my actions
• Overextending myself to the point of burnout
• Doing things out of a feeling of obligation rather than the calling of my heart
• Following force of habit rather than the voice of inspiration
• And other things that undermine my ability to be of true service in the world. 

So first things first: allowing myself the rest and recovery my body and mind need as this chapter of life comes to a close, and a new one begins to reveal itself.  

For me, that means taking my time getting up in the mornings, putting the garden to bed. putting ministry affairs on the back burner for a while, and allowing plenty of time for yoga and meditation between shifts of deep-cleaning the house, sheds, and garage. 

And, allowing plenty of time to envision and begin to manifest the new studio as well as plans for Spoken Earth Ministries in 2025. 

• New artwork? You bet.
• Offering classes as well as metaphysical gatherings both locally and online? YES to both!
• Maybe even giving a retreat or two!
• And allowing for periods of rest and regeneration as well. 

I am super excited now to have both the time and the space to offer it all from my heart, and can't wait to see it all unfold. 

But what about you? What autumn leaves are YOU holding on to at this time? 

I hope my little story provides inspiration for you as we collectively stand at the brink of a tremendous turning point in human history. The entire paradigm of the world we live in is changing. And that is going to require some "dropping of leaves" for all of us. 

Letting go can feel scary or even difficult. In my case, it took months to even acknowledge that the business had to go. Even once I did, I put off taking action on it for quite a while, thinking it would be hard or that we should hang on to the income source.

But once we made the committed decision to let it go, the Universe stepped in and made the whole thing go smoothly. (In hindsight, anyway. When we were in the thick of it, it did at times feel like being buffeted by gale force winds!) 

Now, while I am grateful for the opportunity the business afforded us at the time, it feels like the whole world is opening up with so many more beautiful opportunities that align far better with our souls' desires! 

So whatever autumn leaves you may be holding on to in your own life, please know that as soon as you are ready to release them, God/Source/The Universe will 100% support you in your efforts. Wishing you highest blessings for it all! 

With love, 

Rev. Ona Christie Martin